Marry Me

A couple years ago at my retail gig, I saw an elderly woman in a wheel chair accompanied by an attendant.  She was wearing a beautiful pink straw hat with a wide brim.  I went up to the woman and complimented her on her wonderful hat. She reached for my hand and asked if I would marry her. I told her I would be happy to but felt that my husband would object.  I also questioned how much satisfaction I could give her.  She informed me that wasn’t looking for satisfaction since that part of her was dead. She then asked me: “If you have a husband, are you the wife?” I responded: “OH HELL NO.” I walked away at that point. I wish I had taken a picture of the hat.