Pacemaker Stat

Ed and I were recently at an airport where we were both pre-checked for security (meaning – old people).   However, the result was different for each of us.  Ed and I have become big bags of spare parts.   When they asked if there were any issues with x-rays, Ed told them he had two artificial hips.  I responded I had a pacemaker and titanium from my hip to my knee.  Folks, this was the second trip I’ve taken since having my pacemaker installed.  My primary observation is that if you happen to be in a hurry, tell the TSA you have a pacemaker and you’ll suddenly become golden.  Upon mention of my pacemaker, the TSA Agent escorted me over to the line for the “special” x-ray and held a bucket while I emptied my pockets.  I went through the scanner and she put the bucket on the conveyor belt which I retrieved moments later.  I was out in no time.   Ed, on the other hand, had a totally different experience.  TSA put him in a long x-ray line; patted him down and then hand searched his carry-on bag.   Because of his swarthy good looks, I think they suspected he might be an elderly terrorist.   He finally got out about 10 minutes after I did.  The inevitable happened – I laughed hilariously which caused him to be annoyed.   Ed gets over being angry and annoyed very quickly (which is a trait I value since I’m a handful to live with).  By the time we got on the plane we were back to being that annoying couple that loves every moment we spend together. I did go through regular x-ray later on the same trip by accident.  Have you ever watched cartoons where Wiley Coyote gets electrified?  The visuals of the electrical currents running through his body is how I felt. I don’t think I’ll ever make that mistake again.