OMG, Let me in!!

I worked on my own at the retail gig yesterday.  Toward the end of my day while waiting for my replacement, I got a call to action by my bladder (a call which should be understood by anyone reading this).  However, I continued to get customers and, as a result, kept putting off the call.  Just when I could wait no longer, my replacement arrived.  I scurried to the men’s room which is a distance from my work area.  Finally reaching my destination, I found the men’s room was closed for cleaning.  Seeking relief, I asked the woman in the adjacent storeroom if there was a container in the store room that could hold liquid.  Since the only containers they had were cardboard, I had no choice but to dash to the downstairs men’s room.  I sprinted to the elevator in the next corner of the store.  Once I got on board the trip took so long I couldn’t believe it was only one floor. While I was in the ride down I realized I was as close to an emergency as possible without standing in a puddle. As the elevator doors opened, I ran across the hall to the downstairs bathroom bursting through the door. I began preparing myself for the long awaited relief.  In the men’s room there is a hall leading to the facilities.  When you turn left you come to the stalls and the sinks – it takes another left to reach the urinals.  As soon as the door closed behind me, I released the colonel from my trousers to eliminate any delay once I reached my target.  I made the first left turn and there were two young men getting ready to leave.  I ran past them with the colonel hanging out of my trousers.  Because my pants are black and my flesh is pink, my too for urination was clearly visible and the two young men looked perplexed seeing an old man that way.  All I could think to say was: “Sorry gentlemen”.  I was fijnally able to see the urinal and my colonel sprand to action.   At long last I began feeling releif.  Even though the ordeal probably only lasted five minutes it seemed like a lifetime.  The amount of joy I felt at the end of my journey was indescribably and I returned to my area a happy man.  Since that experience, I have found I can get over, under or around any barricade put up while a public restroom is being cleaned.  As an older guy I have less time to waste once the urge hits so I can only suggest you move out of the way,