No Meal Here!

I have a physical characteristic that men never talk about.  It is something that causes self-consciousness rather than embarrassment and it does affect how I dress.  I have perky nipples.  They are not particularly large but they have stood tall and proud as long as I can remember.  As a result, I have always made sure that I never leave the house without a tee shirt under my dress shirt.  Otherwise these rascals are clearly pointing the way forward.  Wearing a tee shirt only is a sartorial no-no for me.  Summer polo shirts are only worn if the fabric is heavy enough to keep my protuberances from showing.   Winter is even more of a challenge – thank goodness for sweaters.  I was thinking about this today because a customer asked me my opinion about a “fashion” tee shirt she was buying for her son.  I felt the weight of the fabric and, without even thinking, told the woman I would never wear the shirt.  I told her my nipples would be too obvious.  Several years ago Ed and I took a trip to Barcelona with very good friends.  At that time Tommy Bahama silk shirts made were very popular.  I purchased two or three of these shirts for both Ed and I in preparation for our trip.  While we were walking down a narrow lane in the old town with our friends, we passed a woman carrying her baby.  After she passed one of our friends started laughing and told us he saw the baby follow my chest with her eyes smacking her lips.  Even though the style of the shirt was tropical, I put on a tee shirt under it as soon as we got back to our room.  There is the old joke about young men always carrying condoms in their wallets – I carry Band-Aids in mine.