My Life as a Male Stripper (8)

Many of my fans have asked me about the behind the scenes preparation of a successful stripper. They want to know if preparation is as glamorous as the performances themselves.  I thought that I would give a tour (so to speak) on behind the scene preparations for the performances I give.  Some of my prep work is done before I even leave my house. I put sticky pomade in my hair at home because I need warm running water to wash the pomade off my hands. Another task I do at the house is applying pancake makeup to cover up old scars and the ravages of time.  I have never dressed in drag in my life; however, a helpful drag queen told me about a beauty supply store where I can buy pancake makeup by the gallon. Over the years this has resulted in considerable savings.  With makeup applied, I leave the house.  Generally, there are three venues I perform in; bars/clubs, private parties, and (since most of my fans are older than I am) more and more performances are in assisted living and retirement homes.  At private parties, assisted living centers, and retirement homes the dressing room facilities are generally reasonable.  I’m either given total access to an extra bedroom or a bathroom.  The bathroom dressing room can  be a challenge  because many of the residents have small bladders and have no issue with banging on the door with enthusiasm.  Bars/Clubs feel free to call almost any open space a dressing room.  Because of that, I always insist on a large dressing room with bright lighting.  I never get one, but I always insist on it.  Usually the dressing room consists of a storeroom in the back.  It’s not unusual to find the only furniture provided are empty beer kegs.  I put my prosthetic device on the cleanest flat surface I can find.  I glue specifically designed to firmly adhere with skin but relatively easy to remove with solvent.  I put glitter in my hair (thus the reason for the sticky pomade) and Crisco all over my body so that glisten under the lights.  Originally I used Johnson’s Baby Lotion but, as I’ve aged, I’ve found that Crisco is available in bulk which makes it more affordable.  At my age, my skin soaks up the lotion like a sponge.   Finally, I pick out the costume I’m going to wear that night.  I have a variety of custom costumes including a couple of fireman outfits, a sailor uniform, camouflage jock straps and merman fins.  All I have to do now is waiting for my upbeat, yet seductive, music letting me know it is time for me to burst onto the stage. I know that I probably left out a lot that I usually do before a performance but this will give you a good idea of the work involved.  It’s not all about glitz and glamour.  There is a lot of hard work getting to your fans but, for them, it’s worth it.

(The origin of my prosthetic device is discussed in “My Life as a Male Stripper (2)” posted on June 12, 2015)