The Colonel is Back

Recently, I have been introduced to a cannaboid product that, at least in this man’s view, is nearly miraculous. It’s made from the hemp plant and in a short period of time made a significant and unexpected improvement to my quality of life. Additionally, the longer I take it I realize there are side effects. I have had to redefine side effects for myself because, in the past, side effects have always been bad things. My side effects recently have all been positive. One of the side effects surprised me. Because it is a topic many people are uncomfortable with, I have written it in euphamisms. People know I’m not shy so this is actually me being sensitivel I have body parts that I have developed close relationships with over the years. In fact, three of these parts I have referred to as the “Colonel and the boys” for years. The boys are not active participants in this story because this side effect exclusively impacted the Colonel. Over the last few years I’ve had some health issues. Medications for a couple of these issues have have caused the Colonel to spend more and more time napping and less and less time standing at attention. I have become accustomed to the Colonel being nearly comatose although I look back with fondness to the comeraderie we used to share. The surprise positive side effects I’ve been experiencing have turned my body into a lab with me providing a primary observer role. One evening I was lying in bed watching TV when I realized there was unusual activity going on to my south. Throwing back the covers, I came face to face with the colonel. This, from the outset, is unusual because the Colonel’s gaze is usually fixed on my feet. This eye to eye contact had become rare. It is becoming a more frequent experience as the Colonel spends less time napping. I’m not saying he gets up to dance the Macarena, but it’s good to see him awake and stretching every once in a while. Like Sleeping Beauty, the colonel’s long nap is over and the sleeping giant has been awakened.